My Beloved WoMen,
I am reading again the work of the author Paul Verhaeghe, a famous professor of clinical psychology and psychoanalysis at the University of Ghent (Belgium). I love his work and always used it at university with my students. Very inspiring!
In his recent book Intimacy he fights against the Cartesian way of life that got out of hand today:
we have separated body and mind and the socially dominant influences, such as media, are aimed at increasing that separation. This leads to more accidents such as depression and burn-out.

That was my first culture shock when I freshly embarked as a very young African-Tunisian student at the Sorbonne Paris III. I discovered Then the French enlightenment theory based on the Cartesian way of thinking “Je pense donc je suis” (I think there for I am).

So basically the whole western philosophy is based on “I am my Mind”. Therefor I spent my whole life in the West struggling with the identification ‘I am my mind’, and that denial of the body. As a dancer I found that insane! But I adjusted and adapted to the western rules.

I tried even harder when I started living in the Netherlands, my 5th country since I left Africa. I love the Netherlands. It’s my home. But I disliked the mental cage due to the extreme form of identification with the mind. The thought that we are our rational intelligence, which is superior to our physical intelligence was very violent towards my beliefs system.

However like a chameleon, I adapted to the environment of my new home country and became ‘more Dutch than the Dutch’.

I lead 15 years of schizophrenia mind vs body. Like Catherine Deneuve in the film ‘Belle de Jour’ who was leading a double life between being a bourgeois lady and a prostitute.

I was leading a double life where during daytime I practiced the Cartesian principle ‘I am my Mind’ as an academician at the university of Amsterdam.
And in the evenings and week-ends I practiced ‘I am my Body’ dancing my Divine & Goddess Dance with hundreds of ‘schizophrenic’ women like me.

Until I could not take in anymore being torn between two separate identities, two worlds which were not allowed to be together, let alone at the same time. It has become unbearable! I got a deep depression that ended up in a burn-out.

I took the time to heal, to self-reflect, dance, be and think: how do I want my life to go in? How can I live and work, all the time, as Body & Mind, as whole?

During my burn-out recovery process, I took the ‘Divine Vow’ that from now on I will go through life only as ‘Whole’, never ever compromise again.

I took the vow that no matter what I do, I will stand proudly in life and say loudly ‘I am whole, I am Body & Mind’.

And the magic is that since I had the courage to speak up my own truth, I inspired other women to find their own voice. I had since the privilege to help with my work thousands of women around the world to empower themselves and find the path towards their own wholeness.

So Merci, a deep thank you, for your trust to share the FeMale wholeness (and wholiness) journey together.
Merci for being my wild & Sensual partners in crime in this amazing WoMen empowerment journey!

Merci for being YOU!

Happy new 2🧿2🧿! That this new year will make up feel whole again!

Looking forward to dancing & hugging with you,
With a loving embrace,
Kaouthar

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